Tuesday, August 28, 2012

It's Time

It has literally been months since my last post...MONTHS!  I kept thinking that I needed to share all the horrific details of the roller coaster God has put me on the past few months.  It made me shy away from writing because truthfully, I don't want to relive it.  Once was enough.  Once was plenty.  But man, God has taught me a lot...here's what has happened...

Early April, Tom and I excitedly shared with our friends and family that George would be a big brother.  Two weeks later, we sat in my doctor's office thinking we would be seeing our healthy baby for the first time and the main thing I remember hearing was my doctor saying, "I'm concerned."  Worst words in the world for a doctor to say to you really.  Everything after is a blur.  I wrote it all down at the time.  Every horrible emotion.  I can honestly say that I understand the curse so much more now.  When Eve ate of the tree in the garden, God told her that because of that there would be great pain in childbirth.  And there was when I delivered George...trust me.  There was!  But then I went through a different childbirth.  I went through the birth of a child who never really had a chance in our world's eyes.  It was all pregnancy tissue our world would tell me.  And man, there was GREAT pain.  I felt that I would never be whole again.  I felt that I would never be able to be a mom again.  I felt that it was all my fault.  I went through the ENTIRE gamut of emotions.  I felt it all I think.  But the beautiful thing about the God I believe in, He never intended for us to sit in that pain, for the curse to be it.  

God recently taught me one of the coolest things I think I have learned.  It was in His curse, that He brought His solution.  He didn't give us a Savior who was already a king, or He didn't say ok Jesus, it's time for you to go to earth, I'll make you a ten year old.  No, He sent His Son, my Savior, in the form of a baby.  Through the pain.  Amazing.  And it is in Christ where I have begun healing, first, because I can KNOW where my child is and I can KNOW where I'm going.  My heart still hurts.  Often.  I still cry for a child that I long for, but as my husband preached this weekend, when Chaos encounters Christ there is Perfect Peace.  

Our story doesn't end there (I gave you fair warning, it has been a roller coaster).  13 weeks and 5 days ago, God gave me another child.  This one is growing healthy and strong and I pray that he or she is continuing to grow.  I struggled a lot at the beginning.  A lot.  I felt that I couldn't attach myself too much, because it was only a matter of time before God would take this one away too.  But Tom (seriously, he's smart) said something that is etched in my mind.  He said, "Sarah, we aren't guarenteed to have George forever, if he dies at 5 are you going to wait until our kids are 6 to love them?  A child is a gift, no matter how long we have them."  He's right.  George is a precious gift, I love that child so much.  This child in me is a precious gift, I love him or her so much.  And the child I lost, was a precious gift for the 9 weeks I had him or her, and I love him or her so much.

So there you have it, my justification.  So now here I am...anxiously awaiting to see my babies...one in 6 months, and the other when I get to heaven.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

The Art of an Easter Egg Hunt

So, some of you do have the pleasure of knowing my husband well, while some of you not as much.  But one thing about him is that he is the only 28 year old I know who still LOVES Easter Egg Hunts.  I mean, tomorrow, we will go to my in-laws house, and they will have eggs hidden for all the kids...and Tom.  So, one would think that Easter Egg Hunting-ness would rub off on George a bit, as he pretty much wants to be just like his daddy (proof of this:  tonight, in the car, tom is tapping my leg to the beat of the song on the radio and we see George start tapping his own legs too!).  Moving on...

Today, we tested this theory by taking George to his first ever real hunt.  We had a Super Egg Bowl at church last weekend where he tried to throw his eggs, but this was a true, pick em up as you find em and put em in your basket kinda hunt.  So we went over to Uncle Aaron & Aunt Lauren's house...Jack and Natalie were there too of course.  

I think it is safe to say that he doesn't QUITE have the same passion as his daddy...

 He was quite unsure to start with!

 But all it took was an egg or two and this kid had it down!

He did get tired of it all after 6 eggs though, but it was good practice for the showdown at Nina & Papa's tomorrow...he will be ready!!


Friday, April 6, 2012


So this week we celebrated yet another major holiday (not March Madness, that was the holiday that took me on my 3 week hiatus), but Cardinal's Opening Day!  Check out this picture of George & Daddy:

Tom dreams of the day that George will anticipate this day as much as he does and it is already a mandate in our family that Cardinals' apparel is worn on this great, great day.  To top it off, the Cardinals won!!  Here's to the next six months of our lives...Go Cards!!

Today, being Good Friday, Tom and I both had the day off so we took George on his first hiking trip.  He wasn't sure at first he liked it...

But he quickly got used to being carried by Daddy (please note the sign they are walking by.  Tom says that they will break all sorts of rules when I'm not around like that and just say "we're boys, Mom!").

After awhile, he got sick of riding and wanted to walk...

He even took the lead!

On another note, but a way more important note, today is Good Friday.  It was 11 years ago on Good Friday, that I accepted what Christ did today as the necessary atonement for my sins to reconcile my relationship with God.  It humbles me that my Savior would endure the most humilating and shameful form of death this world has ever seen, that He would willingly take on my sin, becoming disgusting in the eyes of His Father, and be forsaken, all to be able to say that "It is Finished" meaning the sins of the world have been paid and the relationship between us and God had been restored.  Amazing...what a Savior!!  Praying you too know this truth this Easter!


Thursday, April 5, 2012


So you might be thinking...Sarah, you take a three week hiatus and the first thing you talk about is footwear?!  Well, yes, but it's a cute story, I promise!!

So, George walks a lot...as you can see...he's always doing something, walking something, so the kid needed some new shoes for summer...We thought through our options.

First, they can't be too clunky...and pumas really do nothing for George's figure...

Second, they had to be as cool as he is...OBVIOUSLY!!

And these were the winners!!  George was super pumped about them.  So much so that when I told him about his new shoes, he took them from me and proceeded to walk around saying, "sues, sues."  He's really in a repeating everything you say phase right now.  Like he said "turtle" the other day, and he says "ide" when he wants to go outside...Super cute!  But this post isn't about the things he says, but about the things he wears!  Sorry for the digression...(I think I used that word right?!?!).   But, now with these new shoes, this kid is ready to take on summer and hang out outside to his heart's content.  This weather has allowed him to too!  It's all he wants to do and when he has to come in he throws a small fit!  Check out these pictures of Springtime in our house:
 Hope you too are enjoying this weather....maybe you need new shoes too!


Thursday, March 15, 2012

Let the MADNESS Begin!!

It's practically a holiday around this house!  It's March Madness!!

This year, George filled out his first bracket.  In order to do so, we originally thought blocks.  We would offer him two blocks, each one a color of the teams in the game.  Whichever one he went for, that was the team he picked.  Well that didn't work.  We quickly discovered he kept going for the block in Tom's left hand or for both.  We needed a new strategy!  So, we went to the hoop.  If George made the shot, he was picking the first time (on the top of the bracket) to win, a miss was for the second team.  Thus, we have his bracket. I will keep you updated on how he is doing...his Final Four Champion:  Colorado State University, an eleven seed!  Sorry Bud, don't think it's going to happen, but hey, it is March MADNESS, I guess anything could happen!



Tuesday, March 13, 2012

There will be MUD!

This past weekend, if you were not outside, you were CRAZY!  It was unbelievably beautiful!  Tom and I took advantage of the weather to do the much needed yard work we had.  It kinda stunk this year because I didn't have an excuse.  Two years ago, I was pregnant and "it hurt to bend over for that long" (nice one, huh?!) and then last year, someone "had" to watch George!  This year, nothing.  George actually LOVED the opportunity to be outside!  In fact, getting him to not throw a fit when its time to come in has become our biggest challenge!

This weekend was a weekend of firsts for George.  While we were out, he had his first TRUE encounter with mud and dirt and worms and all the things I have been told that boys love.  While I was a super over-motherly freak about some of it, I learned just to lean back and let him explore!
First things first was the introduction to the worm.  Unfortunately this picture was AFTER his fascination, but he liked it...a lot!  I freaked out, naturally.

After that was had some good b-ball time in the yard.  My mom got George this sweatsuit for his birthday, or Christmas, whichever one I guess.  Tom says it makes him look like the grandpa in Modern Family.  Eh, I say he just looks like he's going to go to the mall at 8 AM just to walk...
The it was on to our first wheelbarrow ride.  Every thing was great in the beginning.  Then George decided he wanted to sit in the front and start reaching out.  He tipped the thing over and landed flat on his face, falling head first out of the wheelbarrow.  Surprisingly, no tears followed, I'm telling you, this kid's pain threshold did not come from me!

We ended the day with George's first trip to Steak-n-Shake.  He loved it, but was not so impressed by the hat.  I guess if it were truly the talking one from the commercial, he might have been a little bit more intrigued!

Enjoy your week and your beautiful weather.  We already have taken two walks, two trips to the park, one good swing, numerous games of imaginary horse (George doesn't even shoot, but he still beats me) and its supposed to be gorgeous for a while.  I guess we won't see you this year Winter...it's been a good ride...


Friday, March 9, 2012

They REALLY are born to play basketball!

When I moved to Indiana, I had heard that people were born to play basketball...like it's in their blood or something.  Well seeing as George is the only first generation "Hoosier" in our family (and by this I completely mean a person born and bred in Indiana and not a stinkin' IU fan), I learned from him first hand that it is true!!  This boy seriously cannot get enough!  In fact, ball is one of the only words that you can distinctly understand from him (other than go of course!).  He received a basketball goal for his birthday from his Uncle Chad and Aunt Sarah, and we have not been able to get him to put down the ball since!

Last weekend marked the end of Upward Season at Northside.  Upward is a basketball program that supports the motto that every child is a winner.  Outside of learning how to play basketball, they are given the far more important lesson that Christ died for them!  Well this season, George obviously wasn't old enough to play, but he definitely thought he was!  We would go up to practice when Tom's team was practicing, and we had to literally remove him from the court!  Game days were rough too as he didn't want to sit with me but rather wanted to play!  By far my favorite memory of the season was Tom holding George up to the rim for him to just touch it.  George didn't want to just touch it but wanted to GRAB it... and not let go!!  Tom tried to bounce him up and down to get him to let go of this rim that was 8 feet in the air to no avail.  Instead, in bouncing him, he caused him to hit his head on the rim, which gave us a crying one year old with a death grip!  Finally, after what seemed like hours but in reality was probably 30 seconds, he let go but after several laughs and judgments made by the large crowd of parents watching...if only I had my camera THAT day!!  Anyway, I caught a few cute photos from last weekend of George and his daddy:

George LOVED being part of the action as Daddy warmed his team up...it lead to 20 minutes of crying for me when Tom had to hand him back over, but whatever!
Look at that handsome coach!!

Now that Upward is over, we must turn our attention back to college basketball (but to be honest, I'm not sure Tom's ever left it...I mean he did teach his boys the Motion Offense).  Tom at this moment is watching the Purdue vs. Ohio State game on my iPod because it is the only thing that will let him watch it on the Big Ten Network (we don't have cable...we're cheap people!).  Then Sunday starts our favorite thing in March...March Madness!  Check back next week for George's bracket!  I'm not sure yet how he will fill it out, but we will come up with something.  Let me know if you have any ideas on how he can pick!

Oh and I'll leave you with this Happy Spring picture.  It kinda fits as George has a basketball in his hands.

Happy Spring/Freakishly Warm Winter!

~ Sarah